NO SEX PLEASE! We’re Nigerian.

Over at Linda Ikeji’s blog, controversy is brewing. The topic of the day is anal sex, and the responses are so hilarious, that I thought I’d deviate from the theme of this blog to showcase it. Below is a typical response:

Anonymous said…

So Nigerians indulge in anal sex? why am I suprised? Bloody hypocrites! If you engage in anal sex as a heterosexual, you are a closeted GAY and a psychotic pervert. May those of you who engage in such dirty acts leak shit through your annuses [sic] and catch an STD that has no cure. God don’t like ugly!

And another:

Anonymous said…

I’ve not, I’ll neva try it. men can be wicked, wen u re down wit pie [sic], dey’ll move on,,,,,,,,,,, don’t be decieve guls [sic].

July 28, 2011 9:14 PM

The above words by the way are; Piles and Girls. Of course the people in question HAD to be anonymous.

This blog’s position on the issue of sex has already been clarified. Good Igbo girls don’t know the meaning of the word. What I will say is that every Igbo person knows that their father turned around and looked at their mother on the wedding night. There was a loud explosion (which happened for all your subsequent siblings and which you thought you heard that night when you were not really sleeping…yes, you know the one) and afterwards your mummy’s tummy started getting big because she ate too much garri. And then one morning, there was an annoying wailing baby who soon turned into an annoying trailing toddler and then they grew up and took  over half your chores and that was that.

Naturally if sex is incomprehensible, anal sex must be much more so.

However, this response takes the cake:

Anonymous said…

By the the way, my boyfriend, then my husband now mistakingly penetrated my anal, it was half way in and I cried hell that day. couldn’t walk well for the rest of the day.. anal sex is a no no.

Mistakes, huh. Pull the other one, guys!

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